If you’ve come to this website, I imagine that something is bothering you. There is either something you don’t want (like anxiety, depression, an unhappy relationships) that you haven’t figured out how to fix, or there is something you do want (such as a new career, peace, good relationships) that that you haven’t achieved on your own. If this is true, and you have the desire to change – you are ready for therapy.
The work starts simply – what is going on now that’s troubling you? How did it start? What do you want to have happen instead? And from that place, I begin guiding you to change. The change I speak of is in you – your thoughts, beliefs, choices and actions. We can and will talk about others in relationship to you but the only place you really have leverage is in yourself. In our work, I will challenge you on your old beliefs about yourself, relationships, life, and what we can expect out of it. I start from a place of knowing both the perfection that is inside each of us, and the human imperfection that we also are.
I work with people who grew up in “happy families” as well as “dsyfunctional families” (and ones we might say are in-between). Sometimes the happy ones are tougher, because you don’t know why things aren’t turning out as you wanted or planned. Intelligent people (who I work a lot with) are especially frustrated that they haven’t been able to think or work their way to peace, love, or fulfillment. It’s OK, I understand. Sometimes, you need someone on the outside, (think of me as a consultant) to see things more clearly. We all have blind spots, and that’s a big part of therapy.
I provide counseling for many issues such as:
I’m known around Seattle for my specialty working with Nice Guys and People Pleasers. These are people who put others needs, wants & emotions in front of their own. A good short-term strategy. A lousy one for their own long-term happiness or the sustainability of long-term romantic relationships.
I use a variety of approaches and techniques in my work with individuals. My core philosophy is family systems theory, and I use a variety of tools, approaches and homeworks – whatever I find true and useful, I bring to my work.
While I meet in person as the main part of my work, I also will do phone and Skype sessions for existing clients who are either traveling or who have moved out of the area.